Therapy for
perfectionism.
Make room for goals, relationships and rest without measuring your worth by getting everything right.
When good never feels good enough.
Caring about your work or having high standards is not a problem by itself. Perfectionism can become painful when those standards feel non-negotiable and your sense of worth depends on meeting them. A mistake can feel like a verdict on you, rather than something to learn from.
You might appear capable while spending hours checking, comparing yourself with others or replaying what you could have done better. Even achievements can bring only brief relief before the next expectation arrives.
Putting things off
If a task has to be done perfectly, starting can feel risky. You might delay decisions, wait until you feel fully prepared or avoid something you care about because you cannot guarantee the outcome.
Never feeling finished
You might overprepare, repeatedly revise or find it difficult to delegate. Rest can bring guilt, and reassurance may not last. These patterns can leave little time or energy for other parts of your life.
More than high standards.
In How to Be Enough, clinical psychologist Dr. Ellen Hendriksen describes perfectionism through the experience of not feeling good enough, even when you are doing well. Her work offers a helpful distinction: you can value doing something well without making each result a measure of your worth.
Therapy can explore the rules behind self-criticism, such as 'I must not disappoint anyone' or 'If I make a mistake, I have failed.' We can ask whether these rules still help you, what they cost and how to make them more flexible. The aim is not to stop caring about things that matter to you.
Flexible standards
You can choose the level of effort a task needs, take feedback seriously and adjust when circumstances change. A setback is information about a situation, not the whole story of who you are.
Rigid rules
Every task can feel equally important, and anything short of your standard can feel unacceptable. Success may be discounted while mistakes receive most of your attention.
How I help with perfectionism.
We look at how perfectionism works in your everyday life and what it is trying to protect you from. That might be criticism, uncertainty or disappointing someone. Understanding that purpose helps us choose changes without turning therapy into another demand to get yourself right.
I draw on Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT) and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) to work with all-or-nothing thinking, rigid 'musts' and 'shoulds', and the behaviours that keep the pressure going. We practise making choices guided by your values, rather than only by the fear of falling short.
Question the inner rules
Notice the standard you are applying and what you believe a mistake would mean. We can test assumptions and develop a more balanced response, without forcing praise or pretending a disappointment does not matter.
Try small experiments
An experiment might be sending a low-stakes email after one review, starting with an imperfect first draft or leaving a minor task unfinished until tomorrow. We agree on an appropriate task and compare the outcome with your prediction.
Respond to self-criticism
Practise noticing a critical thought without treating it as an instruction. We can work toward a fairer, kinder response to mistakes. Self-compassion does not mean avoiding responsibility; it changes how you support yourself while taking it.
Broaden what matters
Explore the parts of life that can get crowded out by achievement, such as relationships, enjoyment and rest. We can practise boundaries, asking for help and making room for activities that do not need to prove anything.
Work with Chelsie.
Perfectionism is a core area of my practice. I help adults explore all-or-nothing thinking and build flexibility around demanding expectations. Our work is collaborative and practical, with space to understand your experiences as well as try different responses. The consultation is an opportunity to ask how I would work with your concerns and whether my approach suits you.
Education
Master of Arts in Counselling Psychology, Yorkville University; Bachelor of Arts in Psychology, McGill University
Professional registration
Member of the College of Registered Psychotherapists of Ontario (CRPO), Registration #11680
What sessions involve.
You do not have to arrive with a perfectly organized explanation. We can start with an ordinary situation where the pressure shows up, whether that is a work deadline, a decision or trying to take a day off.
Your first session
The first 50-minute session includes intake and assessment. We discuss your background, current challenges and goals, including where perfectionism helps and where it costs you. Together, we begin shaping a plan for the work ahead.
Ongoing sessions and practice
We can examine a recent example, identify the rule or fear behind it and plan a manageable experiment. At the next session, we review what happened and adjust. Practice is not graded, and having a difficult week does not mean you have failed therapy.
Start with a conversation.
A complimentary 15-minute phone consultation lets you ask questions, discuss what you are looking for and consider whether we are a good fit before booking a full session.
Appointments are individual and virtual. You need a private space, a stable internet connection and to be physically located in Ontario at the time of your session.
Session details
- Session fee
- $190 per 50-minute session
- Format
- Individual virtual therapy
- Who I work with
- Adults 18+ in Ontario
Questions about perfectionism.
Will I have to lower my standards or stop being ambitious?
No. The aim is to make your standards more flexible, so you can decide what deserves your effort and respond differently when something falls short. You can care about doing well without requiring every outcome to prove your worth.
Can I be a perfectionist if I procrastinate or feel disorganized?
Yes. Perfectionism can involve avoiding or delaying a task because the standard feels too difficult to meet. It is not limited to being organized or producing flawless work. We look at the expectations and fears behind your pattern, rather than how it appears from the outside.
How is perfectionism different from OCD?
Perfectionism can involve rigid standards and self-criticism. OCD involves obsessions and compulsions that can include a need for things to feel just right, but the two are not interchangeable. They can overlap. If intrusive thoughts or rituals are part of your experience, we can discuss how that changes the treatment approach.
How much does therapy cost, and is it covered by insurance?
Sessions cost $190 for 50 minutes. I provide a receipt, but do not offer direct billing. Contact your insurer to confirm coverage for an Ontario Registered Psychotherapist, including any annual or per-session limits.
What if self-compassion feels like letting myself off the hook?
You can acknowledge a mistake and take responsibility without attacking yourself. We can explore your concern that kindness might reduce motivation and test a different response in a low-stakes situation. You do not have to force yourself to believe affirmations.
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Is this therapy based on Ellen Hendriksen's book?
Her book How to Be Enough is a useful resource for understanding self-criticism, flexibility and feeling good enough. I like that framing, but therapy is tailored to you and draws on CBT and ACT rather than following the book as a fixed programme. North Point Therapy is not affiliated with Dr. Hendriksen.
How long does therapy for perfectionism take?
There is no fixed timeline. We consider your goals, how longstanding the patterns are and what else is affecting you. We review progress together and adjust the pace or plan when needed.
Do I have to complete exercises perfectly?
No. We use practice to learn about your expectations and responses. Not completing something, feeling uncertain or noticing a setback can give us useful information. We can adjust the exercise so it is manageable and relevant to your life.
What should I ask before choosing a therapist?
Ask how I work with perfectionism, what change might look like and how we will review whether therapy is helping. You can also ask about fees, scheduling and anything that would help you assess fit. The free consultation gives you a place to start.
Who can attend virtual sessions?
I work with adults aged 18 and older across Ontario. You must be physically in Ontario during your appointment and have a private space with a stable internet connection.
Further reading includes Dr. Ellen Hendriksen's How to Be Enough and the Centre for Clinical Interventions' perfectionism resources. These inform the educational explanation on this page, not a diagnosis or an individual treatment plan. Naming an author does not imply an affiliation or endorsement.